Western Mass Will Soon Be Surfing Like It’s 1999!

Doug Williams | May 01, 2008, 05:16 PM

Having read the second line of today’s announcement by Verizon about its to-be-launched broadband services in 23 western Massachusetts communities (see prior post), I was immediately reminded of a scene from Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery, in which the following exchange took place:

Dr. Evil: Okay no problem. Here's my second plan. Back in the 60's, I had a weather changing machine that was, in essence, a sophisticated heat beam which we called a "laser." Using these ‘lasers,’ we punch a hole in the protective layer around the Earth, which we scientists call the ‘Ozone Layer.’ Slowly but surely, ultraviolet rays would pour in, increasing the risk of skin cancer. That is unless the world pays us a hefty ransom.

Number Two: [pause] That also already has happened.

I wouldn’t exactly characterize DSL as a “new service,” but I suppose for those without broadband access, it isn’t a false statement.

I figured Verizon’s PR department probably could have pulled an old press release, swap out a few town names, maybe change the prices, and save a bit of time. Lo and behold, I wasn’t too far off. Check it out: exactly 9 years ago, DSL was rolled out in Boston. Pretty similar message. Pretty similar speeds.